MY TEQUILA ALLERGIES ARE ACTING UP

Lately Bro's have been steady stickin' to beer and scotch at the bar. It's all you really need in your repetoire. Maybe a glass of wine here and there, but the beer and whiskey covers all bases, it can be sophisticated and classy, manly and rugged, or even sloppy if you so desire….I've become pretty accustomed to the type of drunk I become off the beer and scotch combo…and you know what? I like it. Its not a violent drunk [unless you're drinking jack and/or Jim Beam-that's a different story], and I generally become a laid back peaceful and generally happy Bro. Not to say that things don't get out of hand every now and then, but hey nobodies perfect. Unfortunately, I recently realized what happens when I stray from the usual formula. You see last Tuesday night Paully, EvRocker and I got Tequila drunk. Not the "I took a shot of tequila and feel woozy"-but the "i just drank an entire bucket of extra strong margaritas" – jump off. Let me remind all of you out there in case you forgot: the tequila drunk is not a good look. Let me describe it for you. First off you get the permanent squint in one eye, and apparently one of your legs shrinks considerably because you will be stumbling and swaying immediately. There is actually no possible way to prevent yourself from being completely horizontal at some point in the night. And to those around you it will seem as if you've been shot out of the creep cannon only to land in the middle of a crowded bar like a drunk mexican peasant rockin a fresh poncho and a silly Mexican grin. For some reason your shoelaces automatically become untied and a permanent wet stain/spill/drool develops somewhere on your shirt/poncho. You will seriously terrify all females around you, accuse bartenders of being rude for not accepting your 50 cent tip, and somehow find yourself folded up and asleep in the corner of the 1 Train. Of course, you'll wake up drunk off your ass, still rockin' that tequila poncho and call in to work complaining about "allergies" and mistakenly call your Human Resources manager "sweetheart" at the end of the message.