THE NEW DOUBLE-FISTING
You might really think that double-fisting is something you do at parties with short-term open bars. This makes sense. Get it while the gettin's good. You might also think that double-fisting is something you do if you're a really fucking stupid drunk fat-ass. This makes sense as well. Git-r-dun. But what you might not really think is what you might should probly really think most. Double-fisting is about efficiency. True. It is about revelry. True. But really, it's about diversity.
Enter Mozz-n-Scotch. You know, as in Sticks-n-Fiddich. While it may appear, in the photo above, as though I am about to wash my face using Tater Tot Soap, this is actually a photograph of the exact moment when I realized that Mozz-n-Scotch achieves all three requirements of a good double-fisting. It's efficient (eat + drink), it's revelrous (eat+drink), and it's diverse (eat+drink). Not to mention it's like buying 3 for 2 because it inevitably comes with a side of delicious marinara sauce. So the next time you really wanna break out, you wanna hit the town and get wasted, you should revert to the new double-fisting...the mozz-n-scotch way.
You might really think that double-fisting is something you do at parties with short-term open bars. This makes sense. Get it while the gettin's good. You might also think that double-fisting is something you do if you're a really fucking stupid drunk fat-ass. This makes sense as well. Git-r-dun. But what you might not really think is what you might should probly really think most. Double-fisting is about efficiency. True. It is about revelry. True. But really, it's about diversity.
Enter Mozz-n-Scotch. You know, as in Sticks-n-Fiddich. While it may appear, in the photo above, as though I am about to wash my face using Tater Tot Soap, this is actually a photograph of the exact moment when I realized that Mozz-n-Scotch achieves all three requirements of a good double-fisting. It's efficient (eat + drink), it's revelrous (eat+drink), and it's diverse (eat+drink). Not to mention it's like buying 3 for 2 because it inevitably comes with a side of delicious marinara sauce. So the next time you really wanna break out, you wanna hit the town and get wasted, you should revert to the new double-fisting...the mozz-n-scotch way.
10 Comments:
delectable.
that is real delicious, but to kick it up notch listen to morrissey at the same the: Moz-n-Mozz-n-Scotch
p.s. the post was a banger
What if you also had TLC playin' and it was a T-Boz-n-Mozz-n-Mozz-n-scotch
what if you were also making love to bill cosby at the same time
Coz-n-T-Boz-n-Moz-n-Mozz-n-scotch
what if bill cosby had a big jew nose and it was the: Shnaz-n-coz-n-tboz-n-mozz-n-mozz-n-scotch
What if HBO decided to market it as the:
OZ-n-Shnaz-n-coz-n-tboz-n-mozz-mozz-n-scotch
and what if the target demographic of said HBO show was mothers and it was ma's-n-Oz-n-Shnaz-n-coz-tboz-moz-mozz-scotch?
what if that joint was set in the desert
Baja-n-ma's-n-Oz-n-Shnoz-n-coz-tboz-moz-mozz-scotch?
game over.
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